# shows

title:
El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer)


blackboard:
I will not yell "Fire!" in a crowded classroom


title:
Two Cars In Every Garage and Three Eyes on Every Fish


blackboard:
I will not get very far with this attitude


blackboard:
I will not make flatulent noises in class


blackboard:
I will not hide behind the fifth admendment


blackboard:
I will not torment the emotionally frail


blackboard:
I saw nothing unusual in the teachers lounge


blackboard:
This punishment is not boring and pointless


blackboard:
I will not yell "She's dead" during roll call


blackboard:
I will not call the principal 'Spud Head'


blackboard:
I will not charge admission to the bathroom


blackboard:
All work and no play makes Bart a dulll boy


title:
Springfield (Or, How I learned to stop worrying & love legalized gambling)


blackboard:
I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers


blackboard:
My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man


blackboard:
I will not go near the kindergarten turtle


blackboard:
Organ transplants are best left to the professionals


blackboard:
The pledge of allegiance does not end with 'Hail Satan'!


blackboard:
I will not celebrate meaningless milestones


blackboard:
There are plenty of businesses like show business


blackboard:
I will not re-transmit without the express written permission of Major League Baseball


blackboard:
Five days is not too long to wait for a gun


blackboard:
I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis, Jr.


blackboard:
I will not dissect things unless instructed


blackboard:
I will not whittle hall passes out of soap


blackboard:
Ralph won't "Morph" if you squeeze home hard enough


blackboard:
Adding "Just Kidding" doesn't make it okay to insult the principal


blackboard:
Bagman is not a legitimate career choice


blackboard:
Cursive writing is not mean what I think it does


blackboard:
Next time it could be me on the scaffolding


blackboard:
I will not strut around like I own the place


blackboard:
The good humor man can only be pushed so far


blackboard:
I do not have power of attorney over first graders


blackboard:
The first amendment does not cover burping


blackboard:
I will not complain about the solution when I hear it


blackboard:
Wedgies are unhealthy for children and other living things


blackboard:
I will stop talking about the twelve inc pianist


title:
Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield


title:
Raging Abe Simpson & His Grambling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"


blackboard:
I did not learn everything I need to know I kinderkarten


